First Song I Heard This Morning

Let it speak to you...

What Life Would Be Like
by Big Daddy Weave

I wish I was more than a man.
Have you ever felt that way?
And if I had to tell you the truth,
I'm afraid I'd have to say
That after all I've done and failed to do
I feel like less than I was meant to be.

And what if I could fix myself?
Maybe then I could get free.
I could try to be somebody else
Who's much better off than me.
But I need to remember this
That its when I'm at my weakest I can clearly see

Chorus
He made the lame walk, and the dumb talk
And He opened blinded eyes to see
That the sun rises on His time,
yet He know our deepest desperate need.
And the world waits, while His heart aches,
To realize the dream.
I wonder what life would be like if we let Jesus live through you and me....yeah.

What if you could see yourself through another pair of eyes?
And what if you could hear the truth,
Instead of old familiar lies?
And what if you could feel inside
The power of the Hand that made the universe
You'd realize.....

CHORUS

All our hearts they burn within us.
All our lives we've longed for more.
So let us lay our lives before
The One who gave His life for us.

CHORUS

Let Him live through you and me...yeah.

All for now (I think),
Lisa

Examining Hannah

Well, when two Godly woman mention something to me, I guess I should listen. Within days of each other, both women suggested looking at Hannah, from 1 Samuel. So, I've done a little study on her and believe you me, she's a very interesting woman.

Take aways for me:

• Like other great women of faith (Sarah, Rebekah, and Rachel), Hannah was barren not out of the consequences of sin but for the glory of God, in his due time.
• Human intervention proved no comfort for her. Elkanah could not comfort her. Her rival provoked her to more distress. Only God could comfort. And her praise reflects that (see below).
• Her prayer was effectual because she completely poured out her ALL soul to the Lord; out of her grief and anguish (even prayed with others were feasting). She knew God alone was her only help. She trusted in God and prayed in that faith, alone.
• She prayed that the Lord would remember her (1 Samuel 1:11). And the Lord rememered her (1 Samuel 1:19).
• She prayed with perseverence. "As she kept on praying to the Lord" (1 Samuel 1:12).
• She has peace before receiving her blessing -- "Then she went her way and ate something, and her face was no longer downcast" (1 Samuel 1:18). That can only come from supernatural intervention.
• Her praise and worship (Hannah's prayer) came from her own experiences but her focus of her praise was not her experiences; the focus of her praise was on the character of God.
• Her story is one to be remembered. And one to give glory to God. Even Mary, the mother of our Lord, was especially mindful of Hannah's prayer, as we see in her own psalm in Luke (see below)

Then Hannah prayed and said: "My heart rejoices in the LORD; in the LORD my horn is lifted high.
1 Samuel 2:1

And Mary said: "My soul glorifies the Lord and my spirit rejoices in God my Savior
Luke 1:46-47

All for now (I think),
Lisa

Safe in the Arms of Love

Hope you all have a great weekend! Ponder these lyrics and let them carry you so the safe arms of our sweet Lord.

Carry You
by Amy Grant

Lay down your burden
I will carry you
I will carry you my child, my child
Lay down your burden
I will carry you
I will carry you my child, my child

Cause I can walk on water
Calm a restless sea
I’ve done a thousand things you’ve never done
And I’m really watching
While you struggle on your own
Call my name, I’ll come

chorus

I give vision to the blind
I can raise the dead
I’ve seen the darker side of hell
And I’ve returned
I’ve seen those sleepless nights
And count every tear you cry
Some lessons hurt to learn

chorus

All for now (I think),
Lisa

Just How Big?

Oh how I'm continually being stretched by just how big I have perceived God. Each time I think big He tells me bigger! It's mind blowing. A dear friend just sent these lyrics. May they bless you also.

Big Enough
by Ayiesha Woods

You turned water into wine - how extraordinary
Gave sight to the blind - and still I carry
My own load when you told me
To take your yoke 'cause yours is easy
And even though my issues seem trivial
You alone are never too imperial
Its just the way that you love me
Its enough to convince me

And I don't wanna box you in
You've been doing big things since the world began
Sometimes I just don't wanna believe
That you're big enough - but you're big enough yeah!

I don't wanna box you in
You've been doing big things since the world began
Sometimes I just don't understand that you're big enough
But you're big enough Jesus!

You turned darkness into light - keep my lamp burning
And you are my everything
There's no denying, your love is so amazing
And even though my problems seem typical
Nothing for you is ever too difficult
You never have reservations - love without limitations

And I don't wanna box you in
You've been doing big things since the world began
Sometimes I just don't wanna believe
That you're big enough - but you're big enough yeah!

And I don't wanna box you in
You've been doing big things since the world began
Sometimes I just don't understand
That you're big enough - but you're big enough

Oh, no matter how I try to get around it - I'm reminded
Wherever I go I'm totally surrounded
It's all about you - I can never doubt you
Even if I wanted to…

And I don't wanna box you in
You've been doing big things since the world began
Sometimes I just don't wanna believe
That you're big enough - but you're big enough yeah!

So I don't wanna box you in
You've been doing big things since the world began
Sometimes I just don't understand
That you're big enough - but you're big enough

That you're big enough
That you're big enough

That you're big enough
That you're big enough yeah!

All for now (I think),
Lisa

God Moves
A friend sent me this song. I'd not heard it before but learned from her that the words are actually a poem called "Light Shining Out of Darkness" written by William Cowper, a hymnist who struggled in a lifelong battle with depression. Take a moment to let it sink in.

God Moves

God moves in a mysterious way
His wonders to perform
He plants His footsteps in the sea
And rides upon the storm
Deep in His dark and hidden mines
With never-failing skill
He fashions all His bright designs
And works His sovereign will

So God we trust in You
O God we trust in You

O fearful saints new courage take
The clouds that you now dread
Are big with mercy and will break
In blessings on your head
Judge not the Lord by feeble sense
But trust Him for His grace
Behind a frowning providence
He hides a smiling face

So God we trust in You
O God we trust in You
When tears are great
And comforts few
We hope in mercies ever new
We trust in You

God’s purposes will ripen fast
Unfolding every hour
The bud may have a bitter taste
But sweet will be the flower
Blind unbelief is sure to err
And scan His work in vain
God is His own interpreter
And He will make it plain

All for now (I think),
Lisa

Pondering Rest

Here's one that I've been pondering since "rest" became one of my words and then my pastor went over the first set of commandments a couple of weeks ago. It's about honoring the remembering the Sabbath day by keeping it holy. A few times in Hebrews (3:18, 4:1, 4:10), the author speaks of "entering His rest" or "God's rest" - and it seems it not necessarily a "day" but a "state of being".

So, I'm really going to the fact that God created EVERYTHING (the heavens and earth) in 6 days and rested. He ceased. He hasn't created anything new (ex nihilo) since then has He? I think it means that even the future has already been created (Jesus even said, I am going to there to prepare a place for you - in John). Even the new Jerusalem has been created. We just haven't seen it yet. Genesis 2:1-3 says (emphasis mine):

Thus the heavens and the earth were completed in all their vast array. By the seventh day God had finished the work he had been doing; so on the seventh day he rested from all his work. And God blessed the seventh day and made it holy, because on it he rested from all the work of creating that he had done.

So, entering His rest means being obedient to His plan (and thus surrendering yours). See what I mean? If He's created everything (including the future) then it stands to reason where God says I know the plans I have for you (Jeremiah). And seeking Him with our whole heart and being obedient to that follows in His plan. And that's His rest. We don't need to do anything else... the plans have already been made (thus no more addition on His part - He ceased). That's how we enter into HIs rest. We cease working (on our own strength) too. Does that make any sense at all?

You know, the Bible verse in my weekly Bible study this week was Phil 4:13 (I can do everything through him who gives me strength)... but I think I'm learning the basis for that is the verse before it... Phil 4:12 (I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want.). So, I think the secret to being content is to do all things in Christ - and only do things in Christ - i.e. to be obedient to God's plan - and that's entering into His rest (the pressure is off us). Now that's peaceful.

Make sense? I'm not trying to convince you. I'm really just trying to hold it up to the light with other folks for a reality check.

All for now (I think),
Lisa

It All Depends on How You Look at It

So, yesterday morning I had reason to look through my old journals again. The funny thing is that I had not done this, until a few weeks ago, almost ever! My journals go back to 1989 so I have a few of them. The first time I did it, I had a horrible experience. What I saw was endless cycles and no seeming resolution. I felt forgotten. And all my efforts had just gone to waste.

But since then (woah, about a month), I've been on quite a journey with the Lord. One of learning about who He is. And entering into His rest. That is such a peaceful place. I've learned that entering His rest means ceasing my own efforts, my own thoughts, my own ideas, my own trying. It also means surrendering all my rights and demands. I had to leave myself completely in His mighty hands. I just come and sit at his feet.

So, yesterday morning, when I was looking through my old journals. It came to me about His appointed time. I looked up on my bureau to find a table card a good friend had given to me. It simply had my name with the verse:

For the revelation awaits an appointed time; it speaks of the end and will not prove false. Though it linger, wait for it; it will certainly come and will not delay.
Habakkuk 2:3

The appointed time has yet to come. But each moment, since my birth, has been planned and ordered by a wonderful God, a magnifient One. And this time as I thumbed through the pages of my journal, I actually smiled at the thought of Him being there and now I want to make sure I'm there for it. Know what I mean? Actually seeing and knowing that He is there - every second. And give Him the glory. Acknowledging His presence. I think that's what Proverbs 3:5-6 means to me.

I did a brief word study on God's timing. See for yourself:

You will arise and have compassion on Zion, for it is time to show favor to her; the appointed time has come.
Psalm 102:13
Sarah became pregnant and bore a son to Abraham in his old age, at the very time God had promised him.
Genesis 21:2
For this was how the promise was stated: "At the appointed time I will return, and Sarah will have a son
Romans 9:9
Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up.
Galatians 6:9
Humble yourselves, therefore, under God's mighty hand, that he may lift you up in due time.
1 Peter 5:6

All for now (I think),
Lisa

I Am Captivated. Are you?

Read these lyrics slowly and let them sink in deeply.

Captivate Us
by Watermark

Your face is beautiful
And Your eyes are like the stars
Your gentle hands have healing
There inside the scars
Your loving arms they draw me near
And Your smile it brings me peace
Draw me closer oh my Lord
Draw me closer Lord to Thee

(chorus)
Captivate us, Lord Jesus
Set our eyes on You
Devastate us with Your presence
Falling down
And rushing river, draw us nearer
Holy fountain consume us with You
Captivate us Lord Jesus, with You

Your voice is powerful
And Your words are radiant bright
In Your breath and shadow
I will come close and abide
You whisper love and life divine
And Your fellowship is free
Draw me closer O my Lord
Draw me closer Lord to Thee

(chorus)

Let everything be lost in the shadows
Of the light of Your face
Let every chain be broken from me
As I’m bound in Your grace
For Your yoke is easy, Your burden is light
You’re full of wisdom, power and might
And every eye will see You

(chorus)

All for now (I think),
Lisa

The Word on My Words

I decided to explore more in depth each of the words I have felt in the past 2-3 weeks. It was a delightful exercise and a fun way to get into the Word. May it fill you the way it filled me.

To God be the glory!!!

(You can click on the image to see it better)

All for now (I think),

Lisa

What a Difference a Day Makes!

So, you may know that nothing happened this weekend (that I thought would happen). But this weekend was not a failure!! Although the anxiousness and the tension in my spirit was trying to tell me otherwise. That energy sent me down some new paths. I had first gone down the path to ask God for further illumination about His promises to me. I tried that, but didn't hear anything new. But I realized that asking for more information about the promises was potentially an area of weakness for me. Asking for more illumination put my thoughts and energy on the promises and not on God. Now, let me make sure to say that there is nothing wrong with the promises of God and receiving them!!! He is about promises! His word confirms that. So, it's not that at all. My confession is that recently I was more about the promises than I was about God.

So, I took another Godly friend's advice concerning where I have put my trust. Have I put it in the promises or in the power of God? I think entering His rest is more about trusting not so much for a promise, but just trusting in His Word.

I asked Him to show me what He wanted to show me. He showed me that I don't need signs. He's showing me who He is. He's faithful, perfect, true, timely, never failing, trustworthy, competent, lovely, desirable, factual, fearful, mighty. His word repeatedly points to that. That's the rest I can enter into. That's His rest! And that's where I want to be.

THE BEST PART OF THIS!!!! And this is the part I can't wait to share with you is that I feel the same giddyness in anticipation of how God will work that I felt with the promises He gave me concerning my father (in 1994). It's a very long story and involves my sister's suicide, a woman in my dad's life, and my dad's health. Suffice to say, one night I was at the end of my rope and quite metaphorically "put my dad on the altar". I had an amazing experience of peace that night then fell asleep. That next morning I experienced a giddyness in anticipation of how God will work. And He did! It wasn't at all how I had expected it, but He was faithful.

This time, it happened a little differently. But Sunday night I told someone that I was at the very end of the limb... at the tip of the leaves. I was basically at the end of myself. And, with my friend's advice, I traded the hope of the promises for the hope of God! And I have experienced that same peace and that giddyness in how God will work. I trust Him.

So, my new words/phrases:

Rock
Fullness of time
Rely
True
Fully persuaded
Faithful
Peace

All for now (I think),
Lisa

Fully on the Rock

I heard this song when I woke up this morning, and in the car when I went to lunch.

I Will Not Be Moved
by Natalie Grant

I have been the wayward child
I have acted out
I have questioned Sovereignty
And had my share of doubt
And though sometimes my prayers feel like
They're bouncing off the sky
The hand I hold won't let me go
And is the reason why...

[Chorus:]
I will stumble
I will fall down
But I will not be moved
I will make mistakes
I will face heartache
But I will not be moved
On Christ the Solid Rock I stand
All other ground is sinking sand
I will not be moved

Bitterness has plagued my heart
Many times before
My life has been like broken glass
And I have kept the score
Of all my shattered dreams and though it seemed
That I was far too gone
My brokenness helped me to see
It's grace I'm standing on

[Chorus]

And the chaos in my life
Has been a badge I've worn
Though I have been torn
I will not be moved

[Chorus]

All for now (I think),
Lisa

His Own Way, His Own Time

That's been a phrase on my lips since I saw it in a "Streams in the Desert" devotional on July 6, 2008.

It's His story. And regardless of what happens, it will be better than whatever I could have dreamed up! I'm just hanging on for the ride.

It's His time. And regardless of when it happens, it will be not a moment too soon, and not a moment too late. I'm just hanging on.

All for now (I think),
Lisa

What Has Come of Me

As many of you know, God has been speaking to me in amazing ways these last few weeks. And I have received it gladly. Well, truth be told, I've received it openly and perhaps closed it with my own assumptions. I'm sure many can relate.

This past weekend was filled with mixed emotions. Excitement, anticipation, hurt, pain, exhaustion, confidence, bewilderment, worry, rest, peace, eyes up, eyes down, eyes up again. Know what I mean?

Sunday night, I had a great conversation with a long-time friend. Well, I say long-time friend, yes, we met a long time ago, but until last week, we had not seen each other in over 10 years. In just how God works, our renewed friendship was perfectly timed. In a way only God can design, our journeys are so similar it's a bit freaky. And she was calling me to tell me how much what I had said one night spoke to her. Well, Sunday night, her words were learned! I'm just glad it was a teachable moment for me.

We shared our stories and what she told me is that when they Lord speaks to you something you don't have to guess about the rest of the meaning. So often we hear him and then we run off, most times on our own strength, to complete the story. She encouraged me to ask for further illumination... ask, "Lord, what else do you want to tell me about this; what else do you want me to know?" That was good wisdom! Thank you, long-time friend!!

I did that last night, but didn't necessarily hear anything new. And to me, all current events point to the opposite of what He's told me (and others) in the recent past! What I can rely on is that God can call things as not as though they are! (Romans 4:17).

And (of course), today's "Streams in the Desert" spoke to what I have been feeling. It talked about three levels of faith: 1) believing only when we see signs/strong emotions; 2) believing without relying on it; 3) believing when signs/emotions seem to urge the contrary.

Oh yeah, I'm there at 3).

"May God grant us faith to completely trust His Word, even when every other sign points the other way."

All for now (I think),
Lisa

P.S. Words/Phrases for today

Palm of His hands
Dwell
Lay down
Look up
Soverign
Courage
Trust

A Confession of Unrest

A friend just sent this. It could not have come at a better time.

Prayer When Words Won’t Come

O My Father, I have moments of deep unrest—moments when I know not what to ask by reason of the very excess of my wants. I have in these hours no words for Thee, no conscious prayers for Thee. My cry seems purely worldly; I want only the wings of a dove that I may flee away. Yet all the time Thou has accepted my unrest as a prayer. Thou has interpreted its cry for a dove’s wings as a cry for Thee. Thou has received the nameless longings of my heart as the intercessions of Thy Spirit. They are not yet the intercessions of my spirit; I know not what to ask. But thou knowest what I ask, O My God. Thou knowest the name of that need which lies beneath my speechless groan. Thou knowest that, because I am made in Thine image, I can find rest only in what gives rest to Thee; therefore Thou hast counted my unrest unto me for righteousness, and has called my groaning Thy spirit’s prayer. Amen.
-Rev. George Matheson (1842-1906)

All for now (I think),
Lisa

Words Words Words

Do words resonate with you like they do with me? Maybe I'm just a weirdo (you don't have to agree, he he), but a word can come to me, and I can check it in my spirit to see if it's a word that is God-given or not. Today, some more words came. Here are the words. I'll let you know Monday what comes of them.

1. Welcome
2. Completion/Total
3. Enjoy
4. New
5. Love
6. Desire/Want
7. Provide

All for now (I think),
Lisa

A Complete and Total Welcome

I welcome God
Author and finisher
Infinite and wonderful
Complete and total

I welcome God
To do the things He wishes
He made my heart His home
Complete and total

I welcome God
To see the promises
He is faithful
Complete and total

Faith is credited as righteouness
Blessings come now
Righteousness came before
Complete and total

Love and compassion
He is with me
I am with Him
Complete and total

This song just came to me. I welcome it.

God Will Make a Way
by Don Moen

God will make a way
Where there seems to be no way
He works in ways we cannot see
He will make a way for me
He will be my guide
Hold me closely to His side
With love and strength for each new day
He will make a way
He will make a way

By a roadway in the wilderness
He'll lead me
And rivers in the desert will I see
Heaven and earth will fade
But His word will still remain
He will do something new today.

All for now (I think),
Lisa

The ABC’s of Me

As you might know, another recent word that God has given me is “character”. Diving into it, I was reading about character the other day and the article asked, "When people think of you, what would be the first word they used to describe you?" It kind of got me to wondering. So, I asked that of a few friends… some I have known for a long time, some not as long. It was somewhat of a solemn request, but light-hearted answers were welcome too! To my pleasure, most people were very kind and sweet in their responses. Below is a smattering of them…

Artistic
Brave
Creative
Determined
Disciplined
Integrity
Faithful
Genuine
Kind
Mellow
Nurturer
Obedient
Persistent
Real
Sensitive
Talented
Unrelenting

In thinking lately about who God is, I have realized that His is the author of all of these things because He IS all of these things. What I humbly pray is that all these things are not in me, but they are only a reflection in me of who God is. And with that, they (and more) would continue to manifest themselves as God continues to refine me in the crucible of life, of His love.

May He be the only refiner.
May I become radiant!
May I become what I behold!

All for now (I think),
Lisa

Getting it Straight from the Stream

A wonderful poem in today's devotional in "Streams in the Desert" speaks to being still (perfect timing, of course!).

O troubled soul, beneath the rod,
Your Father speaks, be still, be still:
Learn to be silent unto God,
And let Him mold you to His will.

O praying soul, be still, be still
He cannot break His promised Word;
Sink down into His blessed will,
And wait in patience on the Lord.

O waiting soul, be still, be strong,
And though He tarry, trust and wait;
Doubt not, He will not wait too long,
Fear not, He will not come too late.

Exactly what I needed to hear. Thanks be to God!

All for now (I think),
Lisa

Still seeking still
On the art of being actively still

And I—in righteousness I will see your face; when I awake, I will be satisfied with seeing your likeness.
Psalm 17:15

"Still" is one of the words I've been exploring lately. I decided to just write some prose on the subject:

Being still
Brings me to the face of God… might even say the heart of God
Fill my heart
Being still in completeness
Full of compassion and love
Learning to be complete in Him
In His presence
All while holding on
To His promises
The tension between
He is with me, will I be with Him?
Do I depend on Him on my own terms?
Would I have something to add?
Then it would be an independent dependence
But what could I possibly add?
Prayer calls on His presence
Is prayer my preparation for battle?
Or is it the battle itself?
Did His followers ask Jesus to teach them to win souls?
Preach the gospel?
Minister?
No, they only asked Him how to pray
All to know the Lord
In the face of that
What else would I want?
The Lord is pleased
May I live up to what I already have attained (Phil 3:16)
That He who began a good work in me will carry it on to completion (Phil 1:6)
That is "the do"
May I love him enough to be obedient (John 14:15)
And then I AM already complete in Him (1 John 2:5a)
That is "the is"
I am becoming what I behold
Still

Only let us live up to what we have already attained.
Philippians 3:16

being confident of this, that he who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus.
Philippians 1:6

If you love me, you will obey what I command.
John 14:15

But if anyone obeys his word, God's love is truly made complete in him.
1 John 2:5a

All for now (I think),
Lisa

Each Tick is Precious!

Life is so amazing right now, I just don't want to miss a second of it! It just feels so alive with Christ! And the best part is that I'm living right here, right in the moment. At my Bible study last night, I closed our session in prayer. In it, I said something to the effect that God is everywhere (past, present, and future), but we are only in the present so that's the only place we can be with Him! Today, thinking back on that prayer, it reminded me of a song:

Miracle of the Moment
by Steven Curtis Chapman

It’s time for letting go
All of our if only’s
‘Cause we don’t have a time machine
And even if we did
Would we really want to use it?
Would we really want to go change everything?
‘Cause we are who and where and what we are for now
And this is the only moment we can do anything about

Chorus:
So breathe it in and breathe it out
Listen to your heartbeat
There’s a wonder in the here and now
It’s right there in front of you
And I don’t want you to miss
The miracle of the moment

There’s only one who knows
What’s really out there waiting
In all the moments yet to be
And all we need to know
Is He’s out there waiting
To Him the future’s history
And He has given us a treasure called right now
And this is the only moment we can do anything about

And if it brings you tears
Then taste them as they fall
And let them soften your heart
And if it brings you laughter
Then throw your head back
And let it go, let it go
You gotta let it go
Listen to your heartbeat

All for now (I think),
Lisa

... Paul Harvey...

So do not throw away your confidence; it will be richly rewarded. You need to persevere so that when you have done the will of God, you will receive what he has promised.
Hebrews 10:35-36

All for now (I think),
Lisa

Today's Streams in the Desert

After waiting patiently, Abraham received what was promised
Hebrews 6:15

and so will I.

All for now (I think),
Lisa

Ready to Receive

God: Pursuit, Promise, Provision
Lisa: Preparing, Waiting, Resting
(all while trusting, praying, believing, desiring)

All for now (I think),
Lisa

Less Like Scars
by Sara Groves

It's been a hard year
But I'm climbing out of the rubble
These lessons are hard
Healing changes are subtle
But every day it's

Less like tearing, more like building
Less like captive, more like willing
Less like breakdown, more like surrender
Less like haunting, more like remember

And I feel you here
And you're picking up the pieces
Forever faithful
It seemed out of my hands, a bad situation
But you are able
And in your hands the pain and hurt
Look less like scars and more like
Character

Less like a prison, more like my room
It's less like a casket, more like a womb
Less like dying, more like transcending
Less like fear, less like an ending

And I feel you here
And you're picking up the pieces
Forever faithful
It seemed out of my hands, a bad situation
But you are able
And in your hands the pain and hurt
Look less like scars

Just a little while ago
I couldn't feel the power or the hope
I couldn't cope, I couldn't feel a thing
Just a little while back
I was desperate, broken, laid out, hoping
You would come

And I need you
And I want you here
And I feel you

And I know you're here
And you're picking up the pieces
Forever faithful
It seemed out of my hands, a bad, bad situation
But you are able

And in your hands the pain and hurt
Look less like scars
And in your hands the pain and hurt
Look less like scars
And in your hands the pain and hurt
Look less like scars
And more like
Character

All for now (I think),
Lisa

... Paul Harvey...

You know, I noticed something about the two passages below about resting. We have to make every effort to enter rest (Hebrews 4:11). We have to work at resting!! That verse has so much more meaning now to me...and you know the other weird thing, it comes home to me differently now. And so does the second passage.

In the days following my sister’s suicide, I made every effort to help my dad. And on a Saturday I was completely at the end of my rope. That night - I was sobbing in my bed and the verses Matt 11:28-30 came to me (I don’t think I recited them at the time correctly or knew exactly where they were, but I felt they were not my own – they were given to me). After I said them, I felt a lightening of spirit and I fell asleep, and woke up the next morning (Sunday), giddy in anticipation of how God was going to work.

The funny thing is that (I didn't realize it until now) I ceased trying to help my dad. He gave me rest. I found rest (both are in that passage). And my dad is a walking miracle today!!

Now it's coming home to me in a different scenario.

All for now (I think),
Lisa

Resting vs. Waiting

I learned that the Hebrew word for "wait" is "to twist by binding". And in recent experiences I have encountered Christ in my waiting - much like Mary and Martha did in waiting for Christ concerning their brother Lazarus. I have learned that waiting is not passive, but active. I have also learned that waiting has its own reward. And He is right there with me!!

That was then and this is now. As you might have read, I now feel called to "rest". I told a friend the other day that I was going to explore it... I use to think resting and waiting were similar, but they are very different!

Our pastor spoke on Sunday (of course, more perfect timing!) about the first 4 of the 10 Commandments. The 4th commandment is:

"Remember the Sabbath day by keeping it holy. Six days you shall labor and do all your work, but the seventh day is a Sabbath to the LORD your God. On it you shall not do any work, neither you, nor your son or daughter, nor your manservant or maidservant, nor your animals, nor the alien within your gates. For in six days the LORD made the heavens and the earth, the sea, and all that is in them, but he rested on the seventh day. Therefore the LORD blessed the Sabbath day and made it holy.
Exodus 20:8-11

The Hebrew word for rest is the same root word for seven and sabbath. At that perfect time, it means to cease, stop, end. It doesn't necessarily mean to restore (as we think rest is... to rest because you're weary). It means an ending of activity, the cessation of effort. Sabbath does not mean keeping a special day, it means ending a specific effort. God created the the earth, then He rested. Have you noticed that He has yet to create anything new since then? He ceased.

There are a couple of passages that have spoken to me:

There remains, then, a Sabbath-rest for the people of God; for anyone who enters God's rest also rests from his own work, just as God did from his. Let us, therefore, make every effort to enter that rest, so that no one will fall by following their example of disobedience.
Hebrews 4:9-11

I was working. And now I'm ceasing from my labors, my activity, my works, even my waiting.

"Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light."
Matthew 11:28-30

I was weary and burdened. God will give me rest. And there I will find rest (both are in that passage).

All for now (I think),
Lisa

The Stream Has Turned into a Raging River

Today's devotional from "Streams in the Desert" once again fed me wonderfully. Let me share with you the last part:

Trusting even when it apears you have been forsaken; praying when it seems your words are simply entering a vast expanse where no one hears and no voice answers; believing that God's love is complete and that He is aware of your circumstances, even when your world seems to grind on as if setting its own direction and not caring for life or moving one inch in response to our petitions; desiring only what God's hands have planned for you; waiting patiently while seemingly starving to death, with your only fear being that your faith might fail - "this is the victory that has overcome the world"; this is genuine faith indeed.
George McDonald

I hope it feeds you as well.

All for now (I think),
Lisa

Getting Somewhere

Here are new words for me:

1) Righteousness
2) Blamelessness
3) Obedience
4) Rememberance/Carry
5) Character
6) Rest/Still
7) Receive

I hope they speak to you in a way that you can only experience solely because only God could have communicated it.

All for now,
Lisa

Jehovah-Rohi

My Sunday school class is studying the names of God. This past Sunday was Jehovah-Rohi: The LORD my Shepherd. I took notes, and sometimes (ok, I know I'm weird) I take notes in prose fashion. Sunday was no exception.

I am a sheep
Frail, weak, unstable
My Lord Jesus Christ is my shepherd
He is the righteous branch
He will carry me

He will take care of me
I do not lack
Even on dark days, scattered with clouds
He sees

He desires to tend to me
Health, comfort, welfare
He is with me

I am His
The sheep of His pasture
My heart reclines
In His gentle tending care
He is my rest

Trusting His character
Confident in His promise
Obedient to Him
The LORD is there
The LORD is here
He is in me

All for now,
Lisa

The Domino Factor

Actually, wikipedia calls it the domino effect. But with God, His work in my life is much more than a linear sequence. And He is much more than simple.

But what I've seen lately is how each step along the way is useful to Him. And I want to enjoy each domino as it comes. Still seeing the "downed" dominoes behind me and looking forward to the "upped" dominoes in front of me. But focusing on the domino right in front of me!

The other good news here is that even if I mis-step and get out of alignment, He is good (given that I've repented) to get me right back along the road.

All for now (I think),
Lisa

A Promise: God Said it, I Believe It

If you're read my blog for any amount of time, you know that God has given me a promise. And most of you know that God has taken me through a time of development, and through a time of waiting. And now into a time of rest. And yet, even in the time of rest, there is still a wonder.

All of it requires a step OUT in faith. Truly stepping out in genuine faith. And Sunday's "Streams in the Desert" spoke volumes to me. And thank you Nancy for letting me know about it (I keep that devotional at work so I hadn't seen it yet). I just read it this morning.

"God... calls things that are not as though they were." - Romans 4:17

the last paragraph was like water to my thirsty soul...

If God has said so, surely you do not want to suggest He has lied! If He has spoken, will He not fulfill it? If He has give you His word - His sure word of promise - do not question it but trust it absolutely. You have His promise, and in fact you have even more - you have Him who confidently speaks the words. "Yes, I tell you" (Luke 12:5). Trust Him!

All for now (I think),
Lisa

Paul Harvey is a Good Friend

I have noticed a couple of times already that after I take the time to blog about a topic, God shows me just a little more... usually just after I hit "publish". Paul Harvey (with his saying, "and now, the rest of the story") has become my friend. And today is no exception. But is that any surprise? After all, scripture says:

For the word of God is living and active. Sharper than any double-edged sword, it penetrates even to dividing soul and spirit, joints and marrow; it judges the thoughts and attitudes of the heart. Hebrews 4:12

I was just having a coffee break with a friend and was telling her about my blog post. As we were sharing, God revealed to me another theme I often use to encourage people. This is usually around the issue of perspective. Especially when our problems get bigger than how we see God

4) The moon and your thumb

So, you would probably agree with me that the moon is pretty big. And that your thumb is much smaller than the moon. However, if you go outside at night, hold up your thumb, just right, between your eye and the moon, you can obscure the moon with your thumb - making it seem just about as large as the moon. And you can do that with God also. Hold up your problem, just right, and you can almost make your problem as large as you think God is... or worse, even larger than you think!

My experiences recenty with the true presence of God has shown me that God is so much bigger than I could have imagined. Much bigger. And "ten-fold" would be an underestimation, for sure.

All for now (I think),
Lisa

Getting a Taste of My Own Medicine

You know, I've been a believer for a while. And at my age, I have had quite a few opportunities to come along-side other believers to encourage them in their walk (especially with the number of years I worked with youth).

And I have seen "themes" of questions and "themes" of my typical responses. This is not bad nor good, just fact. The interesting revelation as I sit here this morning is that these themes have come back to me ten-fold in the past week. While, in the past, my responses have been God-focused, sincere, and true, I have just recently seen a deeper context of them. I think that's what my Sunday School teacher meant by the deep things of God.

Let me explain...

1) Waiting on a bigger revelation

This is very often a source of confusion for many believers (myself included). When people question what God is doing (especially when they don't readily see Him) , I often use something that I learned from an "Experiencing God" class I took 15 years ago. It involves looking at the story of Mary and Martha with respect to Lazarus. And the analogy that if you are confessed and prayed up on sin, you have to believe that God is about to make a great revelation (like with Lazarus).

This came back to me ten-fold on Thursday. I received a Christianity Today Singles article on waiting. However, the analogy didn't really come to me at the time; it only occured to me later that I have used this same story as encouragement in waiting. What I learned new this week is that waiting has its own reward. And that waiting is not some sort of "boot camp" that you must endure to get to the next step. And that God is right there, in the midst of your waiting, and not just right here, but grieving right here along with you. "Jesus wept" with Mary and Martha. And Jesus weeps right here with me. I don't think I would have experienced the presence of God that I have recently had I not been in wait.

I see His presence.

2) Look for God's face, not just His hand

Now this one I've used often. And I confess now that I might have used it a little piously. While it is true and right to do this, I don't think I fully had the concept down. It wasn't until Thursday when I saw this quote somewhere on facebook - "When you don't understand what God is doing in your life, trust His character." (author unknown) - that I got to thinking about His character. And who He is!

And on Sunday, when I saw this scripture, I received it bountifully! For it talks about God's character.

"if we are faithless, he will remain faithful, for he cannot disown himself." 2 Timothy 2:13

I'm also reading a great book called "Life with God". The whole book is on reading the Bible not for knowledge but to be transformed! To know His presence. I remember Rich Mullins saying that "I don't think you read the Bible to know truth. I think you read the Bible to find God, that we encounter Him there."

This has also happened to me latey as I've been delving more and more into the scripture itself and not relying on others, my class, etc. to do it for me. Now, this has been a desire for me for over five years. And I'm only seeing the manifestation of it now. Unfortunately, my (somewhat limited) desire was for knowledge. I had no idea He would actually meet me there.

I know His presence.

3) God is seldom early but He is never late

This is a saying that a friend told me almost 15 years ago and I've hung on to it since! But it came home to me (again) ten-fold on Saturday. Let me first tell you that I like to long distance cycle. It gives me a lot of opportunity for uninterupted talk with the LORD. But it's not easy. I often "hit the wall" with endurance. And I also confess
that I will use an ipod (with just an earphone in one ear) while cycling. A few years ago, on the MS150 ride, I was struggling to get to La Grange. Just as I turned the curve to head in, the song "Everlasting God" came on. I felt like God arranged that especially for me.

And again this Saturday, while cycling, I hit the wall; and just as I said to myself, "I don't know if I can finish", that song came on again! I realized then that God's timing can wait until the exact moment that you can go on no longer! I'm using that revelation for other parts of my life.

I feel His presence.

And lunch on Friday with a friend help seal this for me. God is showing me practicing the presence of Him.

This is good medicine!

All for now,
Lisa

I See You

sung by Ashley Cleveland
word by Rich Mullins

Lord You're leading me with a cloud by day
And then in the night, the glow of a burning flame
And everywhere I go I see You, and everywhere I go I see You

And You take my hand and You wash it clean
I know the promised land is light years ahead of me
And everywhere I go I see You, and everywhere I go I see You
And everywhere I go I see You, and everywhere I go I see You

Well the eagle flies and the rivers run
I look thru the night and I can see the rising sun
And everywhere I go I see You, and everywhere I go I see You
And everywhere I go I see You, and I see You, oh I see You

Well the grass will die and the flowers fall
But Your Word's alive and it be will after all
And everywhere I go I see You, and everywhere I go I see You
And everywhere I go I see You, and everywhere I go I see You
And everywhere I go I see You, and everywhere I go I see You
And everywhere I go I see You, and everywhere I go I see You

And everywhere I go I see You
And everywhere I go I see You
And everywhere I go I see You
And everywhere I go I see You

All for now,
Lisa

God is Bigger

All for now,
Lisa

Feeling a Little (More) Like David

I was drawn to this Psalm today... Psalm 37

1 Do not fret because of evil men
or be envious of those who do wrong;

2 for like the grass they will soon wither,
like green plants they will soon die away.

3 Trust in the LORD and do good;
dwell in the land and enjoy safe pasture.

4 Delight yourself in the LORD
and he will give you the desires of your heart.

5 Commit your way to the LORD;
trust in him and he will do this:

6 He will make your righteousness shine like the dawn,
the justice of your cause like the noonday sun.

7 Be still before the LORD and wait patiently for him;
do not fret when men succeed in their ways,
when they carry out their wicked schemes.

8 Refrain from anger and turn from wrath;
do not fret—it leads only to evil.

9 For evil men will be cut off,
but those who hope in the LORD will inherit the land.

10 A little while, and the wicked will be no more;
though you look for them, they will not be found.

11 But the meek will inherit the land
and enjoy great peace.

12 The wicked plot against the righteous
and gnash their teeth at them;

13 but the Lord laughs at the wicked,
for he knows their day is coming.

14 The wicked draw the sword
and bend the bow
to bring down the poor and needy,
to slay those whose ways are upright.

15 But their swords will pierce their own hearts,
and their bows will be broken.

16 Better the little that the righteous have
than the wealth of many wicked;

17 for the power of the wicked will be broken,
but the LORD upholds the righteous.

18 The days of the blameless are known to the LORD,
and their inheritance will endure forever.

19 In times of disaster they will not wither;
in days of famine they will enjoy plenty.

20 But the wicked will perish:
The LORD's enemies will be like the beauty of the fields,
they will vanish—vanish like smoke.

21 The wicked borrow and do not repay,
but the righteous give generously;

22 those the LORD blesses will inherit the land,
but those he curses will be cut off.

23 If the LORD delights in a man's way,
he makes his steps firm;

24 though he stumble, he will not fall,
for the LORD upholds him with his hand.

25 I was young and now I am old,
yet I have never seen the righteous forsaken
or their children begging bread.

26 They are always generous and lend freely;
their children will be blessed.

27 Turn from evil and do good;
then you will dwell in the land forever.

28 For the LORD loves the just
and will not forsake his faithful ones.
They will be protected forever,
but the offspring of the wicked will be cut off;

29 the righteous will inherit the land
and dwell in it forever.

30 The mouth of the righteous man utters wisdom,
and his tongue speaks what is just.

31 The law of his God is in his heart;
his feet do not slip.

32 The wicked lie in wait for the righteous,
seeking their very lives;

33 but the LORD will not leave them in their power
or let them be condemned when brought to trial.

34 Wait for the LORD
and keep his way.
He will exalt you to inherit the land;
when the wicked are cut off, you will see it.

35 I have seen a wicked and ruthless man
flourishing like a green tree in its native soil,

36 but he soon passed away and was no more;
though I looked for him, he could not be found.

37 Consider the blameless, observe the upright;
there is a future for the man of peace.

38 But all sinners will be destroyed;
the future of the wicked will be cut off.

39 The salvation of the righteous comes from the LORD;
he is their stronghold in time of trouble.

40 The LORD helps them and delivers them;
he delivers them from the wicked and saves them,
because they take refuge in him.

All for now,
Lisa

Phrases and Verses for Today

Manageable visions are not worthy of an unmanageable God. - Larry Crabb

His own time. His own way. - Streams in the Desert

Be still and know that I am God. - Psalm 46:10

What God declares the believing heart confesses without the need of further proof. - AW Tozer

No good thing does He withold from those whose walk is blameless. - Psalm 84:11

Delight yourself in the LORD, and He will give you the desires of your heart. - Psalm 37:4

For nothing is impossible with God. - Luke 1:37

When you don't understand what God is doing in your life, trust His character. - author unknown

If your presence does not go with us, do not send us up from here. - Exodus 33:15

Do not be anxious about anything. - Philippians 4:6

We take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ. - 2 Corinthians 10:5

The only thing that counts is faith expressing itself through love. - Galatians 5:6

I waited patiently for the LORD; and He inclined to me and heard my cry. - Psalm 40:1

With the goodness of God to desire our highest welfare, the wisdom of God to plan it, and the power of God to achieve it, what do we lack? - AW Tozer

The LORD will fight for you; you need only to be still. - Exodus 14:14

I wait for the LORD, my soul waits, and in His word I put my hope. - Psalm 130:5

There is no fear in love. - 1 John 4:18

He is no fool who gives what he cannot keep to gain that which he cannot lose. - Jim Elliot

I'll always wait for something. Or rather, Someone. And as I long for earthly things, I'll allow them to point me to the deepest longing in my soul. He's the One I await. - Crosswalk Singles

and the best for last:

Day and night they never stop saying: "Holy, holy, holy is the Lord God Almighty, who was, and is, and is to come." - Revelation 4:8

All for now,
Lisa

Today's Devotionals... so GOOD!

You know, sometimes the devotionals I read can just hit me square between the eyes. And today is no exception... all THREE of them. Here are some excerpts:

Streams in the Desert

Whatever occurs in the valley of tears, I know He has chosen me. Dear Christian, do not be afraid, for Jesus is with you. Through all your fiery trials. His presence is both your comfort and safety. He will never forsake those He has chosen for His own.

Our Daily Bread

Far too often, it seems, we limit the significance of church to what happens on Sunday. But the church is to be so much more. It is to be a safe haven, a rescue station, a training center for spiritual service.

My Utmost For His Highest

Do you have even the slightest reliance on anything or anyone other than God? Is
there a remnant of reliance left on any natural quality within you, or on any
particular set of circumstances? Are you relying on yourself in any manner
whatsoever regarding this new proposal or plan which God has placed before you?

We are to “love one another,” John the disciple reminded us, “for love is of God” (1 John 4:7).

So, what all three of these devotionals have told me today (which is nothing that I didn't already know) is that, yes, affliction and brokenness will happen. And tears will come. But He has chosen me (how cool is that?). And what can get ahold of me when God is there? ("His presence is both comfort and safety). And the church (the body, not necessarily one church) should be a training center towards a greater yielded life. Yet, the church should not be the source of the training - just a means. I guess what I'm tyring to say is even relying on the church (even if it's a remnant) is not truly relying on God. Yet, He will use the church (our friends, family, even circumstances) to get His message delivered.

God is love. Jesus is the access. The Spirit is the guide. We rely on those. Alone. Our friends, family, church, circumstances are used by God.

Let's not get that mixed up.

All for now,
Lisa

P.S. Oh, and last night, a friend forwarded me a passage I had not seen before: For I am the LORD, your God, who takes hold of your right hand and says to you, Do not fear; I will help you. Isaiah 41:13

Abraham and Noah

On the plane back from Jackson Hole on Saturday, I simply opened my Bible to read – for I had a few hours of wondrous, uninterrupted silence. I decided to read about Noah – and his account – of the promise given to him by God and just how he responded. I noticed that scripture said that Noah was “a righteous man, blameless among the people of his time, and he walked with God” (Gen 6:9). It also said Noah “did all that the LORD commanded him” (Gen 7:5). Lastly, in the beginning of chapter 8, it says “But God remembered Noah”. Those 5 things really stuck out in my mind. I chewed on them a bit and decided to flip over a few chapters and read the account of Abraham – and the promise given to him. What I noticed was similar. I noticed that in Chapter 15, it says “Abraham believed the LORD and He credited it to him as righteousness”. Further, in the beginning on Chapter 17, God says to Abraham, “Walk before me and be blameless”. I also noticed that when God offered the covenant of circumcision, Abraham, on that very day, did as the LORD commanded him. Then, “at the very time God has promised him, Sarah became pregnant and bore a son to Abraham” (Gen 21:2).

So, 5 things boiled down:

1. Being Righteous
2. Being Blameless
3. Walking with God
4. Doing All that LORD Commanded
5. God Remembering His Promise

I marked those things in my mind and decided I would study them later. Well, “later” came that very afternoon.

Righteousness
I did a google search on “righteousness”. The first entry was Wikipedia and it said that righteousness is one of the chief attributes of God – and is imparted onto us as believers in Christ because God is the only one “right”. It said the Hebrew word for righteousness in tseh’-dek. (Incidentally, would you believe my Sunday School lesson the next day was “A Study of the Names of God: Jehovah-Tsidkenu: The LORD our RIGHTEOUSNESS” (of course!)).

Blamelessness
I also did a google search on “blamelessness”. I found a great sermon by David Wilkerson, of Times Square Church, from 1993 which was insightful. Then, on Sunday, I found in my Bible where I had marked Psalm 19:13 (“Keep your servant also from willful sins; may they not rule over me. Then will I be blameless, innocent of great transgression”) – and put in the margin “definition of blameless”. I went back to the two accounts and noticed that both Noah and Abraham sinned – even after they received their promises. So, blameless doesn’t mean sinless – it just means that willful sins are not ruling over you.

Walking with God
This was an easier one for me. For as a believer in Christ, walking with God means living by the Spirit (“So I say, live by the Spirit, and you will not gratify the desires of the sinful nature” Gal 5:16).

Doing All the LORD Commands
To me, this was simple obedience. But remember, scripture says obedience is better than sacrifice (1 Samuel 15:22). I think there is a fine line there. Being obedient is out of love and surrender. Being sacrificial is usually out of pride.

God Remembering His Promise
Sunday’s “Streams in the Desert” said it best for me: “His own way. His own time”. But I always hold on to 1 Cor 2:9 (‘However, as it is written: "No eye has seen, no ear has heard, no mind has conceived what God has prepared for those who love him’).


Every morning I want to ask myself this question:
Choose this day whom you will serve.

I pray my answer each day will be:
I will be faithful.

All for now,
Lisa

Where Are Your Eyes?

I can confess that the last month or two has sent me on a roller coaster of events, thoughts, emotions, feelings, observations, commands, and promises. All of which has sent me into a bit of confusion. And I know God is NOT a God of confusion. So, Sunday's "Streams in the Desert" devotion was comforting. This was the main verse the devotion was centered around:

We do not know what to do, but our eyes are upon you
2 Chronicles 20:12

The verse was a verse that I had first heard almost 7 years ago. It was right after 9/11 and I went to a Passion event where Louie Giglio was set to speak. Obviously, his talk was centered around the recent terrorist attacks. However, the verse is one I've thought of many times since then. So, the timeliness (of course) was perfect to hear it yet again.

The Streams devotion also reiterated some important things to remember in our daily life:

Living a life of faith often requires us to leave things alone.

If we have completely entrusted something to God, we must keep our hands off it. He can guard it better than we can, and He does not need our help.

It is such a comfort to drop the entanglements and perplexities of life into God's hands and leave them there.

It all reminds me of the marquee at a church near my house. It says:

Sorrow looks back
Worry looks around
But faith looks up

Where are your eyes?

All for now,
Lisa

Nothing But Completely Happy

In today's "Streams in the Desert" there was a line that really struck me:

If I truly believe the past is totally forgiven (1), the present is supplied with power (2), and the future is bright with hope (3), how could I be anything but completely happy?

This is my add - and you can stand on these truths:

(1) "as far as the east is from the west, so far has he removed our transgressions from us."
Psalm 103:12

"All the prophets testify about him that everyone who believes in him receives forgiveness of sins through his name."
Acts 10:43

(2) "When you are assembled in the name of our Lord Jesus and I am with you in spirit, and the power of our Lord Jesus is present"
1 Corinthians 5:4

"I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me"
Philippians 4:13

(3) "There is surely a future hope for you, and your hope will not be cut off. "
Proverbs 23:18

"'For I know the plans I have for you,' declares the LORD, 'plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.'"
Jeremiah 29:11

Lord, I truly believe - with all my heart! And that makes me not only happy but also joyous!

All for now,
Lisa

Feeling a Little Like David

I woke up with a song on my heart this morning.

Create in me a clean heart, O God,
and renew a right spirit within me.
Cast me not away from Thy presence, O Lord
and take not Thy Holy Spirit from me.
Restore unto me the joy of Thy salvation,
and renew a right spirit within me.

Keith Green wrote it. He was a rocking Christian singer! Unfortunately, he was killed in a plane crash in 1982. However, King David actually penned the words originally. According to my Bible, David wrote it when the prophet Nathan came to him after he had committed adultery with Bathsheba.

Here's the whole Psalm:

Have mercy on me, O God, according to your unfailing love; according to your great compassion blot out my transgressions. Wash away all my iniquity and cleanse me from my sin. For I know my transgressions, and my sin is always before me. Against you, you only, have I sinned and done what is evil in your sight, so that you are proved right when you speak and justified when you judge. Surely I was sinful at birth, sinful from the time my mother conceived me. Surely you desire truth in the inner parts; you teach me wisdom in the inmost place. Cleanse me with hyssop, and I will be clean; wash me, and I will be whiter than snow. Let me hear joy and gladness; let the bones you have crushed rejoice. Hide your face from my sins and blot out all my iniquity. Create in me a pure heart, O God, and renew a steadfast spirit within me. Do not cast me from your presence or take your Holy Spirit from me. Restore to me the joy of your salvation and grant me a willing spirit, to sustain me. Then I will teach transgressors your ways, and sinners will turn back to you. Save me from bloodguilt, O God, the God who saves me, and my tongue will sing of your righteousness. O Lord, open my lips, and my mouth will declare your praise. You do not delight in sacrifice, or I would bring it; you do not take pleasure in burnt offerings. The sacrifices of God are a broken spirit; a broken and contrite heart, O God, you will not despise. In your good pleasure make Zion prosper; build up the walls of Jerusalem. Then there will be righteous sacrifices, whole burnt offerings to delight you; then bulls will be offered on your altar.

I guess I can identify with David (not that I'm a king or have committed adultery). But I needed that today.

All for now,
Lisa

Try This Yourself

There are some verses in Isaiah (62:1-5) where Zion receives a new name. For a little exercise, as we are new creations ("Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; the old has gone, the new has come!" 2 Corinthians 5:17), try it with your name!

By the way, Hephzibah was the wife of King Hezekiah, and the mother of King Manasseh. It means "my delight is in her", and it's a symbolic name of Zion, as representing the Lord's favor toward her. Beulah means "married", which symbolically means favored and blessed of the Lord.

Zion's New Name
1 For Zion's sake I will not keep silent,
for Jerusalem's sake I will not remain quiet,
till her righteousness shines out like the dawn,
her salvation like a blazing torch.

2 The nations will see your righteousness,
and all kings your glory;
you will be called by a new name
that the mouth of the LORD will bestow.

3 You will be a crown of splendor in the LORD's hand,
a royal diadem in the hand of your God.

4 No longer will they call you Deserted,
or name your land Desolate.
But you will be called Hephzibah, and your land Beulah
for the LORD will take delight in you,
and your land will be married.

5 As a young man marries a maiden,
so will your sons marry you;
as a bridegroom rejoices over his bride,
so will your God rejoice over you.

So, here's the exercise with MY name!

Lisa's New Name
1 For Lisa's sake I will not keep silent,
for Jerusalem's sake I will not remain quiet,
till her righteousness shines out like the dawn,
her salvation like a blazing torch.

2 The nations will see Lisa's righteousness,
and all kings Lisa's glory;
Lisa will be called by a new name
that the mouth of the LORD will bestow.

3 Lisa will be a crown of splendor in the LORD's hand,
a royal diadem in the hand of Lisa's God.

4 No longer will they call Lisa Deserted,
or name Lisa's land Desolate.
But Lisa will be called Hephzibah, and Lisa's land Beulah
for the LORD will take delight in Lisa,
and Lisa's land will be married.

5 As a young man marries a maiden,
so will Lisa's sons marry Lisa;
as a bridegroom rejoices over his bride,
so will Lisa's God rejoice over Lisa.

All for now,
Lisa

More Paul Harvey

Isn't that usually the case... there's always a "rest of the story"... an "and then God"? Well, here's one more...

Yesterday was a rough day, compounded by Tuesday night, when I looked back at my journals and just felt a little forgotten. And it made me question if I heard from God... if I've ever heard from God. And, then, for a split second... is there really a God? wow... can you believe.

You know, satan tried to steal my dance yesterday (it was a rough fight), but by day's end God prevailed. That song, "He will carry me" by Mark Shultz was on at lunch (I was in the car by myself). It put words to everything I was feeling (which is why I posted it yesterday). It also helped put my feelings back into perspective. God is bigger than those feelings, as large and heavy as they may have felt.

I agreed with a friend this morning that this season is requiring surrender and trust, but then again I'm wondering what season doesn't require that? What I am learning new is that surrendering includes my rights and demands (think I saw that on MUFFH today), but I have come to a new understanding about leaning on Him completely... COMPLETELY (or at least more completely -- I don't think we are ever completely dependent on him until we're complete in Him - the other side of heaven).

I felt it differently, for the first time, late last night. I want to stay there. It's very safe - yet VERY vulnerable. Not something I've been good at - vulnerability. Yet it's an intimacy with the LORD that I had yet to experience.

A Word Spoken in Song

This song spoke to me at lunch:

He Will Carry Me
Mark Schultz

I call, You hear me
I’ve lost it all
And it’s more than I can bear
I feel so empty

You’re strong
I’m weary
I’m holdin’ on
But I feel like givin’ in
But still You’re with me

chorus:
And even though I’m walkin’ through
The valley of the shadow
I will hold tight to the hand of Him
Whose love will comfort me
And when all hope is gone
And I’ve been wounded in the battle
He is all the strength that I will
Ever need
And He will carry me

I know I’m broken
But You alone
Can mend this heart of mine
You’re always with me

chorus

And even though I feel so lonely
Like I’ve never been before
You never said it would be easy
But You said you’d see me through
The storm

chorus

All for now,
Lisa

Ditto

Exactly 5 months ago this song spoke to me... it speaks WONDERS to me today!

all for now,
Lisa

Seven Words for Me

I have been pursuing God in a new way lately... and He has been embracing me in such an incredible way - or it has been more apparent to me lately. He has shown me how he has been at work in my life, specifically, for the past 3+ years. So, I'm standing firmly on his promise.

If there are seven words for me lately they would be hope, faith, trust, confidence, promise, wait, and free. And the cool part is that God has given me, through a variety of ways, His scripture to go along with those words:

hope

Against all hope, Abraham in hope believed and so became the father of many nations, just as it had been said to him, "So shall your offspring be." Without weakening in his faith, he faced the fact that his body was as good as dead—since he was about a hundred years old—and that Sarah's womb was also dead.
Romans 4:18-19

faith

By faith Abraham, even though he was past age—and Sarah herself was barren—was enabled to become a father because he considered him faithful who had made the promise.
Hebrews 11:11

trust

The LORD is my strength and my shield; my heart trusts in him, and I am helped. My heart leaps for joy and I will give thanks to him in song.
Psalm 28:7

Trust in the LORD with all your heart and do not lean on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge Him, and He will make your paths straight.
Proverbs 3:5-6

confidence

But blessed is the man who trusts in the LORD, whose confidence is in him.
Jeremiah 17:7

promise

Ask the LORD your God for a sign, whether in the deepest depths or in the highest heights.
Isaiah 7:11

wait

but those who hope in the LORD will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint.
Isaiah 40:31

I wait for the LORD, my soul waits, and in his word I put my hope.
Psalm 130:5

I waited patiently for the LORD; and He inclined to me and heard my cry.
Psalm 40:1

free

It is for freedom that Christ has set us free. Stand firm, then, and do not let yourselves be burdened again by a yoke of slavery.
Galatians 5:1

You, my brothers, were called to be free. But do not use your freedom to indulge the sinful nature; rather, serve one another in love.
Galatians 5:13

all for now,
Lisa

Father's Day is Sunday, June 15!

What Is A Dad?

A Dad is a person who is loving and kind,
And often he knows what you have on your mind.
He's someone who listens, suggests, and defends
A dad can be one of your very best friends!

He's proud of your triumphs, but when things go wrong,
A dad can be patient and helpful and strong.

In all that you do, a dad's love plays a part
There's always a place for him deep in your heart.
And each year that passes, you're even more glad,
More grateful and proud just to call him your dad!
Thank you, Dad ...
for listening and caring, for giving and sharing,
but, especially, for just being you!

Author Unknown

All for now,
Lisa

My Heart, Your Home

Today's MUFHH was just too good! In it, the verse from John 14:23 was referenced (Jesus replied, "If anyone loves me, he will obey my teaching. My Father will love him, and we will come to him and make our home with him.) I just couldn't get this song out of my head while reading it!

Come and make my heart Your home.
Come and be everything I am and all I know.
Search me through and through
'Till my heart becomes a home for You.

A home for You, Lord.
A home for You, Lord.
Let everything I do open up,
A door for You to come through,
And that my heart would be a place
Where You want to be.

Come and make my heart Your home.
Come and be everything I am and all I know.
Search me through and through
'Till my heart becomes a home for You.

You are my portion, filling up everything.
You are the fortune that's causing my heart to sing.
That it's amazing, that You could make
Yourself at home with me.

Come and make my heart,Come and make it Your home.
Come and be everything I am and all I know.
Search me through and through
'Till my heart becomes a home for You.

-- Watermark, 2000

All for now,
Lisa

Something Powerful

I received the below email from a friend. I have no words to describe the flurry of emotions I'm feeling right now. Only tears. Tears of sadness. Tears of joy. Tears twice their weight in gold.

This is an account of the memorial service for Steven Curtis Chapman's little girl, Maria. It was sent to me by my friend, Jim Schmidt. His friends, Rick and Kari Dempsey attended the service and shared this with him.

Hi Everyone,

Thanks for all your prayers for the Chapman family. They certainly have felt the love of God over the past few days from all those who have lifted them up in prayer during this unimaginably difficult time.

Kari and I are flying back to LA as I write after an amazing two days in Nashville . This was life changing. The name of the Lord was exalted in ways that we could never retell. We are in awe at His grace, compassion and mercy. Little Maria's life, although short, has already moved mightily in peoples lives to bring Him glory.

Last night the entire family stood in the church as a long line of friends and acquaintances greeted them, hugged them, cried with them and loved on them. The Chapman family and Steven's ministry has obviously impacted so many. They stood there for more than 4 hours before one of the pastors finally stopped it and had hundreds still remaining in line just sit down and then Steven apologetically, but so graciously addressed the entire group.

At the funeral, both Michael W. Smith and Matt Redman helped lead everyone in worship. Matt led us in a song we often sing that he wrote, "Blessed Be the Name of the Lord." It was amazing to watch the Chapman family sing with loud voices as they hugged one another, "He gives and takes away. He gives and takes away. My heart will choose to say, 'Lord, blessed be your name.'" This song will never be the same to me personally.

We worshipped and sang for 30-minutes. And then the Chapman's celebrated Maria by sharing stories and talking about her for almost an hour and a half, praising God for her life and acknowledging that she was safe in the arms of Jesus. All the while pictures o f Maria flashed on two big screens behind the stage - her little white casket at the foot of the stage. She was buried in the "flower girl" dress she was going to wear in Emily's upcoming wedding.

Jeff Moore sang Steven's song "With Hope" which Steven wrote for a family years ago, going through the same type of tragedy. All of Maria's little friends came forward and placed a flower at the foot of the casket while Jeff sang.

The Chapmans are unwaivering in their love for Christ and doing well. Their entire family was a display of faith in practice at the most difficult time of their lives. No one in the family wore shoes, because the veil had been lifted for Maria. They were on "Holy Ground" and God's presence was felt. Caleb (19) said in his prayer, "while we've always been excited about Heaven, it seems so much more real now...and gets us that much more excited to be there ourselves someday. So we'll live life on Earth as if each day counts until we get there ." He also said that although they are "confused" they've never been so sure about Christ and His saving grace. Caleb likened this to one of those abstract pictures that when you're up close, you can't see what it is, but as you step back, you start to see what the artist wants you to see. He said, "And this is a big picture, so we may have to stand waaayyy back."... but we will see what the Artist has designed and what the picture is. He has his dad's wisdom - well beyond his years.

Emily Chapman (22) just got engaged and said that after the proposal, Maria was the only one who asked, "What did you say?". Maria asked it multiple times. (Of course Emily said "yes" to her future husband). But Emily addressed the 3000+ crowd and turned Maria's question back to everyone listening in regards to their answer to Christ's proposal to each of us,. "What did you say?" Powerful under these circumstances. The good news of the Gospel was presented four times throughout the ceremony by the family.

Steven was a rock and just gave all the glory to God. The model of a humble, Godly man. I'm so proud to call him a friend. His humility and appreciation for everyone there, which was a testament to his character and his sincere faith and love for his God and His son, Jesus Christ. As he hugged and cried with Kari and I, he just kept reminding us that "Heaven is real." Steven shared that after the accident, in the hospital, he held Maria's lifeless body and cried out to God. He cried out, asking to somehow see some kind of sign that she was going to be okay...to see that she was going to be safe. When they got home that night, they found the last picture Maria drew on that Wednesday afternoon on her little art table (she loved to draw!). It was a flower and a butterfly and folded in half like a card.

When Steven opened the card up, she had written one word on the inside - a word he didn't even know she knew how to spell. It was "See." A simple answer to his cry to 'see' that she was safe. Please keep praying for them. They are worn out, sad and yet rejoicing in the Lord. Please pray for Will Franklin Chapman. He seems to be the one that is having the hardest time and struggling with the guilt of the accident. It truly was an accident. Will pulled the car into the driveway and because the family was throwing a party that night for Caleb's graduation, he decided to back the car up onto the grass just as Maria ran out behind the car to welcome him home. There was no way for him to know that Maria was behind that car. The Lord was ready to take Maria home. He knew the number of her days. We stood with Maria's favorite pink blanket draped over his shoulders both days.

All in all God was glorified. Praise Him for His sovereign ways.
Rick (and Kari)

All for now,
Lisa

Read This Somewhere Recently

And thought it was good enought to share...

As we grow up, we learn that even the one person that wasn't supposed to ever let you down probably will. You will have your heart broken probably more than once and it's harder every time. You'll break hearts too, so remember how it felt when yours was broken. You'll fight with your best friend. You'll blame a new love for things an old one did. You'll cry because time is passing too fast, and you'll eventually lose someone you love. So take too many pictures, laugh too much, and love like you've never been hurt because every sixty seconds you spend upset is a minute of happiness you'll never get back.

All for now,
Lisa

A Confession of Longing Like Starvation

I recently referenced these two articles, written by Hudson Russell Davis, who I consider an incredibly brave man.

http://www.crosswalk.com/singles/11576008/
http://www.crosswalk.com/11573521/

I thought I'd give you a reader's digest version of these two articles, well, because they're just that good. Here are some memorable lines from both:

A confession of longing does not indicate a lack of faith. It is simply honesty.

Many of us who are single encounter this accusation in speaking with those who have forgotten their time of trial—if they knew a time of trial. It is as though to suffer in silence is more noble, to live with pretence more spiritual, and to smile through the pain more righteous. I smile through the pain. I give and love and serve—but I am also honest.

A confession of longing does not indicate a lack of faith but it may. If we
[paraphrased] let sin fester or don't consider that reality is neither singular
nor local.

I have come as though through briars, torn, bruised, bleeding, and tired. I have a longing inside of me that colors much of what I see, feel, and think. I long to be married with a longing that consumes. I am not desperate, but the longing hurts like starvation should. Relationships have never been easy for me, but I cannot conceive why they have been so hard and why the wait must be so long.

That time has passed and it has grown increasingly difficult to wake up with renewed hope. In fact, it has been difficult to keep my sense of humor and fight the cynicism. This is part of the reality in which I live but not the whole. If these were the only thoughts in my head I would be nothing but hopeless—and I am not without hope. I had no clue it would be so long or so hard but time is not my enemy and waiting is not punishment.

So when this loneliness feels like death, aches like starvation, I confess that I am alive and well fed. No matter the fears that plague me time is not my enemy and waiting is not punishment.

Time is a thief only if I think of what I do not have. Waiting has caused me to dwell on the absence, to focus on the longing, twisting my energies toward solving this one great mystery. The voices in my head may be convincing, but they are the ghosts of insecurities, false expectations, and wrong thinking. These voices that tell me God has forsaken me, that the waiting is in vain, are not of God. The voices that speak discouragement and paralyze my efforts to serve God have come from below. Time has stolen nothing. Each day is a gift. I may mourn the wife and family I do not have, but time is not my enemy and waiting is not punishment.

Time does not lessen truth, but it does weaken confidence and cloud reason. Over time what we know to be true becomes clouded by the continued presence of failure. At least that is the way it feels. At times no one can convince me to view this protracted sorrow as anything other than failure—personal failure. The truth is, where we see no reward—we see failure. My expectations have led me here, and over time they have challenged me. Since things are not going my way, I want time to stop or the waiting to end.

It is hard to say to what degree the desire for a relationship and the setback of failed relationships have affected my self-concept. At times there exists a cavernous space between the way I feel and what is real. Sometimes the line is so blurred I can hardly perceive the difference. This is the penalty of time. That very fertile heart in which hope once grew so wild has, over time, suffered drought. I am sometimes scared to hope, to believe that the longing will ever be fulfilled. But, while God has not promised me a wife, He is a good God, a merciful Lord who loves me. It is He in whom I hope and to Him I bring my tears.

Time is not our enemy and waiting is not punishment. In fact, the more time that passes the more I become certain that I cannot give up. How could I give up when I have waited so long. Who knows, perhaps the green pastures, in which He means to lay me down, is just over the next hill. I have not come this far and waited this long only to stop short or give up.

At times, the reality of disappointment weighs on me, whispers defeat but I have not lost hope. I live a life that is not focused on finding a wife, but on serving my God. And yet I hope someday to feed the hunger, to ease the pain. If I stop here, if I listen to the voices—then time will judge me and I will have my punishment.

All for now,
Lisa

More to the Story

So, a friend from an art class taken long-ago read some of my recents posts and was compelled to email me. I was happy to hear from her... it was a sincere connection. In her email, she wrote that her sister committed suicide many years ago and wondered if perhaps Brenda did also. She also commented on my desire to marry. "There are many groups out there and I hope you can fulfill your life without feeling you have to be married. I know that loneliness is rough, but there are alternatives. It sounds like you make an effort to do things and get involved. That's great - that's the best way to go about it - [btw - good luck on your bike trip]. We are in 2 women's book groups and also an all female RV group - they offer great support and we're always laughing. :-)"

She also commented about holding on or letting go of a dream, "The sermon topic at our church yesterday was "Holding the Dream" - then she added to it, by talking about Letting the Dream go - kind of fits your Blog about marriage. Sometimes our dreams aren't really what's best for us and letting them go is an option. There is a difference between letting go and surrendering, I think"

So, I replied to her and I figured I should post it here.. for the "rest of the story" (Paul Harvey, indeed). If I'm gonna be brave enough to share some pretty intimate things, I better not do it half-way.

Hey (name withheld),

Thanks so much for the email. That is very kind of you to write. Yes, Brenda did commit suicide. It's an awful tragedy, isn't it? Such a permanent solution to temporary problems. True, Brenda's problems were major, but nothing that couldn't be overcome.

Yes, I do have a desire to marry. A longing to be in an intimate life-long love relationship with a man - with Christ as the center. And I do believe God gave me a promise for marriage: way back in March of 2005 – when I was driving to Bakersfield from LA with a co-worker and I saw two rainbows!! I asked the Lord to give me a sign about whether or not I would marry. And He displayed a beautiful rainbow as if to say YES and then I didn't believe myself so I asked Him to do it again and He did a HUGE DOUBLE RAINBOW!!! I even asked my co-worker if she saw what I did and she did!!!

So, in a way, I'm betwixt and between... meaning, it's a slippery slope to believe Him for a promise (which is much more than a dream). Holding onto it tightly, yet holding onto it loosely enough (surrendering it) to trust Him to make all the moves. I believe, but I continually ask the Lord to help my disbelief.

The Lord has shown Himself faithful to me over and over again (and the trials after Brenda's death were many and great). Scripture says what He has for me no eye can see, no ear can hear, no mind can conceive of the goodness that He has in store. But it's a journey of faith, and my devotional this morning said, "great faith must first endure great trials". Against all hope, Abraham in hope believed [Romans 4:18-25]. So, I hang on to the promise, but I cling to the promise giver. So you see, all in all, Christ in me is the hope of glory! I just want to be obedient.

Much love,
Lisa

All for now,
Lisa

Surrendering: Letting Go But Not Giving Up: A Lesson In Faith

Ok - this is pretty transparent, but here goes... I've tried and tried to do that with the longing to be married… the longing not to be alone. True, my grip has released over the years, but I still feel a finger or two holding on to it. I've tried to give it up, throw my arms up, and just accept that I won't be married, but that’s giving up and that isn't surrendering it at all. I don’t think it has as much to do with the longing itself as the control of satisfying it. Maybe it’s not that I can’t surrender it, but that I can’t seem to keep it surrendered. I guess I just have to continue to do it… sometimes frequently than other times.

Surrendering is letting go
Surrendering is not giving up
The difference is hope
With letting go, hope remains in tact
With giving up, it doesn't
And you can't lose hope
Even if hope gets razor thin
God is there


“Streams in the Desert” – May 19 entry:

when we believe God for a blessing, we must have an attitude of faith and begin to act and pray as if the blessing were already ours. We should respond to God as if He has granted our request. This attitude of trust means leaning upon Him for what we have claimed and simply taking it for granted that He has given us our request and will continue to give it."

the condition for prayer is this:
1. we ask in faith and in Christ's name
2. the oneness with Him and His will

"it will be
given you" (John 15:7)

So, do I have the faith to believe that I will be married one day (soon)? I think my wavering is what is causing His tarrying. So, I stand on these verses... and I just love that one is 11:11.

Now faith is being sure of what we hope for and certain of what we do not see.
Hebrews 11:1

By faith Abraham, even though he was past age—and Sarah herself was barren—was enabled to become a father because he considered him faithful who had made the promise.
Hebrews 11:11

so if all of these trials bring me closer to you
Then I will go through the fire
If You want me to

It may not be the way I would have chosen
When you lead me through a world that's not my home
But You never said it would be easy
You only said I'd never go alone

So when the whole world turns against me
And I'm all by myself
And I can't hear You answer my cries for help
I'll remember the suffering Your love put You through
And I will go through the valley
If You want me to

If you want me to
-- Ginny Owens

All for now,
Lisa

P.S. Some great articles:
http://www.crosswalk.com/singles/11576008/
http://www.crosswalk.com/11573521/

Mercy

The quality of mercy is not strain'd,
It droppeth as the gentle rain from heaven
Upon the place beneath: it is twice blest;
It blesseth him that gives and him that takes:
'Tis mightiest in the mightiest: it becomes
The throned monarch better than his crown;
His sceptre shows the force of temporal power,
The attribute to awe and majesty,
Wherein doth sit the dread and fear of kings;
But mercy is above this sceptred sway;
It is enthroned in the hearts of kings,
It is an attribute to God himself;
And earthly power doth then show likest God's
When mercy seasons justice. Therefore, Jew,
Though justice be thy plea, consider this,
That, in the course of justice, none of us
Should see salvation: we do pray for mercy;
And that same prayer doth teach us all to render
The deeds of mercy. I have spoke thus much
To mitigate the justice of thy plea;
Which if thou follow, this strict court of Venice
Must needs give sentence 'gainst the merchant there.

-- William Shakespeare
"The Merchant of Venice"

From Today's "Streams in the Desert"

I cannot know why suddenly the storm
Should rage so fiercely round me in its wrath;
But this I know - God watches all my path,
And I can trust.

I may not draw aside the unseen veil
That hides the unknown future from my sight,
Nor know if for me waits the dark or light;
But I can trust.

I have no power to look across the tide,
To see while here the land beyond the river;
But this I know - I will be God's forever;
So I can trust.

All for now,
Lisa